Monday, August 27, 2007
Saturday, August 25, 2007
Sorry to keep you waiting....!
Man, there just isn't anything cuter than babies with puppies (and kittens, too...we just don't have any of those..)!!
We don't have a name yet, I'll let you know as soon as I do!
New Family Addition
Nick and Collin have just left on a 10 + hour long adventure to acquire our newest family member.
This is most likely the puppy we will end up with. We are choosing from a liter of 11 pups. The puppy that I picked out by picture alone is named George, but we will be changing that to a more suitable "I'm a great big huge dog" name!
As soon as "George" gets home, I will take lots of pictures, as I am sure you are all very anxious to see updated photos!
This is most likely the puppy we will end up with. We are choosing from a liter of 11 pups. The puppy that I picked out by picture alone is named George, but we will be changing that to a more suitable "I'm a great big huge dog" name!
As soon as "George" gets home, I will take lots of pictures, as I am sure you are all very anxious to see updated photos!
My inspiration for choice of puppy is:
Tonka
TonkaItty Bitty was all excited about the puppy:
"What's that, dad? Oh, yeah, I've got the keys!"
More baby and puppy updates to come!
More baby and puppy updates to come!
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Crying
I was sooo weepy when I was pregnant. The slightest thing could send me into tears. The worst part was the entire time I was crying, I knew that I was being completely illogical, and frightening my husband a little.
Then for a little bit of time, the first 2-3 weeks after having the baby, I was even worse. I would just look at Constantine and bawl my eyes out. I would just see him and think:
"You are worth this extra 50 lbs. You are worth the swollen feet and legs. You are worth the heartburn. You are worth only being able to sleep on my right side for 7 months. You are worth the most terrible labor I've ever experienced. You are worth getting no sleep. You are so beautiful and I love you so much. Please don't ever let anything happen to you, I couldn't bear it."
This morning I had a little cry on the way home from taking Nick to work. For some reason, I just had this overwhelming feeling of missing my brothers, who are scattered all over North America. Each of them for different reasons, but I miss them all. And I started thinking about how I've been missing out on watching Brian's girls grow up. And how Joey has missed out on watching Collin and Cassie grow up. And how everyone (except John) is gone and missing out on Constantine's first years, and how I wish that they were all here to help shape his little life with the many unique qualities that they have to offer.
Then for a little bit of time, the first 2-3 weeks after having the baby, I was even worse. I would just look at Constantine and bawl my eyes out. I would just see him and think:
"You are worth this extra 50 lbs. You are worth the swollen feet and legs. You are worth the heartburn. You are worth only being able to sleep on my right side for 7 months. You are worth the most terrible labor I've ever experienced. You are worth getting no sleep. You are so beautiful and I love you so much. Please don't ever let anything happen to you, I couldn't bear it."
This morning I had a little cry on the way home from taking Nick to work. For some reason, I just had this overwhelming feeling of missing my brothers, who are scattered all over North America. Each of them for different reasons, but I miss them all. And I started thinking about how I've been missing out on watching Brian's girls grow up. And how Joey has missed out on watching Collin and Cassie grow up. And how everyone (except John) is gone and missing out on Constantine's first years, and how I wish that they were all here to help shape his little life with the many unique qualities that they have to offer.
Sunday, August 12, 2007
And then there are those who try...
To make you unhappy, that is. I'm working off of Mary's latest blog entry.
Let me share...
Background information first:
I am divorced from my first husband. We have not been together for 10 years. In the past 10 years, I have been exceedingly generous with the amount of visitation that I have given to his MOTHER. She has been seeing the children once a week and on holidays and special occasions for as long as I can remember. Much to the protest of my children, I have been forcing them to keep this up for the past two years. The older they get, the less time they want to spend with grandma, the more time with their friends.
Not only because of the friend thing has Cassie been protesting, but for about the past year, their grandma has been routinely picking on her hair, clothes, and choice of friends.
My advice to Cassie has been to "just ignore" her comments. She is an ignorant woman, and she isn't able to comprehend that she is being rude or mean....let it go, she's your grandma.
Well, two weeks ago, my dad made arrangements for Cassie and her friend Allison, who is attached to her hip, to go take their Hunter's Safety Course. Then the children's grandma called a few days later, saying that she wanted the children for the same weekend. Cassie very politely told her that she was sorry, but she had already made plans. She told her twice on the phone.
Then the next day during an evening visit with their grandma, Cassie told her again....then she got sick of telling her, and just started ignoring her, because she was getting irritated that she kept having to explain herself over and over. This prompted their grandmother to come in my house when she came back with the children, and proceed to tell my husband that Cassie was rude and disrespectful to her during the visit.
So now:
1: Cassie is upset by Grandma Bonnie.
2: Collin is angry because Cassie is upset.
3. Nick is angry/upset by Bonnie's info.
4. I am in-turn upset by the info given to Nick
What do I do?
Well, I have to go to Cassie and get her side of it. Little sweet Cassie, through tears tells me how her grandmother, on the car ride home, told her that she didn't know why she was spending so much time with her grandpa (my father) because when she was little, he didn't want her around. That in-fact, her grandma (my step-mother) had come into her work and told her that she hated having to have the kids over for an entire week every summer. Then she told her that it's a shame that she only has one friend, and can't make any more, because Allison's mom (Stacey) probably doesn't want her around so much, because there was a time that she didn't want her there at all. She told her that SHE was the only person in her little life that always wanted to have her.
Those of you who know me are probably thinking that at this point, I went to her house and punched her directly in the face while calling her a slew of names.
That was my first instinct. But then I thought about it. Their grandpa just had a heart attack, and I didn't want to upset him. After all, I kinda like the guy. I let it go.
Two days later I get a message on my voice mail from their grandmother saying that she will be picking them up at 10:30 the next morning. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? What is she, dense? Did she think that she had successfully bullied Cassie into breaking her plans with my father, to go with HER? I couldn't sleep that night. I didn't know what I was going to do. If she showed up at my door, or I called her, I couldn't be held responsible for what I did to her. I wanted to punch her DIRECTLY IN HER FACE for hurting my little girl.
Okay, so I didn't really let it go...I was just avoiding it.
SO, 3 am, Saturday morning, I went downstairs to write a letter to put on my door for when she came. There was the first version, saying all the things that I really wanted to say. And the final version, which very diplomatically stated that I could no longer deal with her directly because I was so upset by her ill treatment of the children at the last visit, and that I was going to inform their father of the events as they occurred, and she would have to make arrangements with him from now on to see the children.
WOW, did I ever feel better after writing that. And so did the kids when I told them. There was a general feeling of relief in the house.
I spoke with their father a few days later, after having exchanged emails, he felt the conversation warranted a phone call. He had already spoken with his mom, and told her to just give it a cooling off period. Of course, she completely denied any wrong doing.
"Oh, well" I thought, "At least this is over for a while."
WRONG, WRONG, WRONG!
Apparently, I am still in the land of high school.
I came home from taking Nick to work on Thursday morning to find a three page typed letter taped to the front door of my house.
I'll just sum it up---She is a wonderful grandmother who has never done anything wrong. Who has, in fact, raised my children along with my mother---I have not raised them! She stated that I am a drug addict, a whore, and a terrible, neglectful mother who routinely treats her children poorly. And I am a pathetic loser, because the only friend I can get is my ex-husband's ex-girlfriend. OH, and I am fat, my husband will leave me if I get any fatter, and the only reason I had my baby was to hold onto my husband.
Alright, show of hands, who thinks I punched her in her face now?
Really, what is the proper reaction to that kind of slanderous lying?
This is what I did:
1. Email to ex stating that his mother wrote terrible letter, and I would be mailing him a copy, so that he has a full understanding as to why his mother will no longer have visits with my children unless it is under his supervision.
2. Told the children it will be a very long time before they see their grandma. (This was followed by a collective sigh of relief, immediate followed by cheering)
3. Called my mother to have her withdraw her invitation to John's graduation party.
4. Call to friend to vent.
No, I didn't punch her in the face.
I still really want to.
This blog entry should explain why I only have one friend. I have my family. (this includes my brother's wives, girlfriends and fiances) After that, one other human being to communicate with is quite enough. People are generally stupid and annoying. I would make a happy hermit.
Let me share...
Background information first:
I am divorced from my first husband. We have not been together for 10 years. In the past 10 years, I have been exceedingly generous with the amount of visitation that I have given to his MOTHER. She has been seeing the children once a week and on holidays and special occasions for as long as I can remember. Much to the protest of my children, I have been forcing them to keep this up for the past two years. The older they get, the less time they want to spend with grandma, the more time with their friends.
Not only because of the friend thing has Cassie been protesting, but for about the past year, their grandma has been routinely picking on her hair, clothes, and choice of friends.
My advice to Cassie has been to "just ignore" her comments. She is an ignorant woman, and she isn't able to comprehend that she is being rude or mean....let it go, she's your grandma.
Well, two weeks ago, my dad made arrangements for Cassie and her friend Allison, who is attached to her hip, to go take their Hunter's Safety Course. Then the children's grandma called a few days later, saying that she wanted the children for the same weekend. Cassie very politely told her that she was sorry, but she had already made plans. She told her twice on the phone.
Then the next day during an evening visit with their grandma, Cassie told her again....then she got sick of telling her, and just started ignoring her, because she was getting irritated that she kept having to explain herself over and over. This prompted their grandmother to come in my house when she came back with the children, and proceed to tell my husband that Cassie was rude and disrespectful to her during the visit.
So now:
1: Cassie is upset by Grandma Bonnie.
2: Collin is angry because Cassie is upset.
3. Nick is angry/upset by Bonnie's info.
4. I am in-turn upset by the info given to Nick
What do I do?
Well, I have to go to Cassie and get her side of it. Little sweet Cassie, through tears tells me how her grandmother, on the car ride home, told her that she didn't know why she was spending so much time with her grandpa (my father) because when she was little, he didn't want her around. That in-fact, her grandma (my step-mother) had come into her work and told her that she hated having to have the kids over for an entire week every summer. Then she told her that it's a shame that she only has one friend, and can't make any more, because Allison's mom (Stacey) probably doesn't want her around so much, because there was a time that she didn't want her there at all. She told her that SHE was the only person in her little life that always wanted to have her.
Those of you who know me are probably thinking that at this point, I went to her house and punched her directly in the face while calling her a slew of names.
That was my first instinct. But then I thought about it. Their grandpa just had a heart attack, and I didn't want to upset him. After all, I kinda like the guy. I let it go.
Two days later I get a message on my voice mail from their grandmother saying that she will be picking them up at 10:30 the next morning. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? What is she, dense? Did she think that she had successfully bullied Cassie into breaking her plans with my father, to go with HER? I couldn't sleep that night. I didn't know what I was going to do. If she showed up at my door, or I called her, I couldn't be held responsible for what I did to her. I wanted to punch her DIRECTLY IN HER FACE for hurting my little girl.
Okay, so I didn't really let it go...I was just avoiding it.
SO, 3 am, Saturday morning, I went downstairs to write a letter to put on my door for when she came. There was the first version, saying all the things that I really wanted to say. And the final version, which very diplomatically stated that I could no longer deal with her directly because I was so upset by her ill treatment of the children at the last visit, and that I was going to inform their father of the events as they occurred, and she would have to make arrangements with him from now on to see the children.
WOW, did I ever feel better after writing that. And so did the kids when I told them. There was a general feeling of relief in the house.
I spoke with their father a few days later, after having exchanged emails, he felt the conversation warranted a phone call. He had already spoken with his mom, and told her to just give it a cooling off period. Of course, she completely denied any wrong doing.
"Oh, well" I thought, "At least this is over for a while."
WRONG, WRONG, WRONG!
Apparently, I am still in the land of high school.
I came home from taking Nick to work on Thursday morning to find a three page typed letter taped to the front door of my house.
I'll just sum it up---She is a wonderful grandmother who has never done anything wrong. Who has, in fact, raised my children along with my mother---I have not raised them! She stated that I am a drug addict, a whore, and a terrible, neglectful mother who routinely treats her children poorly. And I am a pathetic loser, because the only friend I can get is my ex-husband's ex-girlfriend. OH, and I am fat, my husband will leave me if I get any fatter, and the only reason I had my baby was to hold onto my husband.
Alright, show of hands, who thinks I punched her in her face now?
Really, what is the proper reaction to that kind of slanderous lying?
This is what I did:
1. Email to ex stating that his mother wrote terrible letter, and I would be mailing him a copy, so that he has a full understanding as to why his mother will no longer have visits with my children unless it is under his supervision.
2. Told the children it will be a very long time before they see their grandma. (This was followed by a collective sigh of relief, immediate followed by cheering)
3. Called my mother to have her withdraw her invitation to John's graduation party.
4. Call to friend to vent.
No, I didn't punch her in the face.
I still really want to.
This blog entry should explain why I only have one friend. I have my family. (this includes my brother's wives, girlfriends and fiances) After that, one other human being to communicate with is quite enough. People are generally stupid and annoying. I would make a happy hermit.
Tuesday, August 7, 2007
Memories
I think it's strange the things the mind remembers.
I awoke this morning with memories of my grandparent's house in Ft. Lauderdale.
The smell of coffee and toast.
The strong smell of soap in the bathroom.
Always knowing that if I looked behind the closed shade in the bathroom window, I would always find a pack of gum.
The glass bottle of Listerine on the back of the toilet.
My grandma hanging laundry in the back yard and telling me that I shouldn't look just at my feet when I'm walking, I was likely to run into something that way.
Climbing the grapefruit tree to get breakfast.
Playing in "the jungle."
The one room cottage we lived in.
The cool doghouses my grandpa made.
Climbing trees and breaking my leg.
Sneaking watching tv when I was supposed to be sleeping.
Climbing chain link fence to sit on top of the storage bays.
The smell of wood from my grandpa's shop.
The warm damp smell outside in the morning.
Honeysuckle.
Running barefoot.
Craig chasing Joey with a lead pipe and hitting him in the head...he so deserved it.
My Big Wheel.
My bike with the silver sparkle seat.
Playing soccer with Sparky Peterson.
Always starting dinner with a salad that had radishes.
Ice cream nightly.
That's just a few of the things that come to mind immediately. I hope that when my kids are the same age as me they can remember a lot of great memories, too.
I awoke this morning with memories of my grandparent's house in Ft. Lauderdale.
The smell of coffee and toast.
The strong smell of soap in the bathroom.
Always knowing that if I looked behind the closed shade in the bathroom window, I would always find a pack of gum.
The glass bottle of Listerine on the back of the toilet.
My grandma hanging laundry in the back yard and telling me that I shouldn't look just at my feet when I'm walking, I was likely to run into something that way.
Climbing the grapefruit tree to get breakfast.
Playing in "the jungle."
The one room cottage we lived in.
The cool doghouses my grandpa made.
Climbing trees and breaking my leg.
Sneaking watching tv when I was supposed to be sleeping.
Climbing chain link fence to sit on top of the storage bays.
The smell of wood from my grandpa's shop.
The warm damp smell outside in the morning.
Honeysuckle.
Running barefoot.
Craig chasing Joey with a lead pipe and hitting him in the head...he so deserved it.
My Big Wheel.
My bike with the silver sparkle seat.
Playing soccer with Sparky Peterson.
Always starting dinner with a salad that had radishes.
Ice cream nightly.
That's just a few of the things that come to mind immediately. I hope that when my kids are the same age as me they can remember a lot of great memories, too.
Sunday, August 5, 2007
The Mysterious Visit
On Friday Markus made a trip home for about 24 hours. He tried convincing us all that he was here with no purpose except to take the opportunity to come visit with everyone.....for 24 hours...and needed to stop at my house to iron his shirt....for no reason...and wasn't going anywhere special....and didn't know what I was talking about when I asked if he was here to propose to Hannah...right....!
So, Saturday at about noon we all gathered at the Cracker Barrel.....
Where Markus announced that he had, in fact, come home to propose to Hannah! Here is "THE RING"!
After which everyone hugged, and expressed surprise and joy! Then Markus and Hannah practiced at being future parents:
And then Markus and Hannah left the Cracker Barrel. Markus got back on the plane to KY:
And Itty Bitty just kept on being cute:
Which takes absolutely no effort on his part at all!
Congratulations Markus and Hannah! I am so happy for you both!
So, Saturday at about noon we all gathered at the Cracker Barrel.....
Where Markus announced that he had, in fact, come home to propose to Hannah! Here is "THE RING"!
After which everyone hugged, and expressed surprise and joy! Then Markus and Hannah practiced at being future parents:
And then Markus and Hannah left the Cracker Barrel. Markus got back on the plane to KY:
And Itty Bitty just kept on being cute:
Which takes absolutely no effort on his part at all!
Congratulations Markus and Hannah! I am so happy for you both!
Friday, August 3, 2007
Zwinky Binkys and Such
What is a Zwinky Binky you ask?
Zwinky Binky: 1) An unusual invention that makes Constantine happy 2) A Crystal Light dipped pacifier 3) The most ridiculous phrase that I utter countless times in a day
Picture if you will a very unhappy, wailing baby-eyes closed as tight as can be arms and legs flailing about, a mile a minute.....sometimes all it takes is my saying "ZWINKY BINKY!!!" in a rather loud and overly enthusiastic voice and plunging a Crystal Light dipped pacifier into the the tiny hole producing the extremely loud crying sound...and *POOF* .....instantly appears a happy, content baby! Pure magic, I swear.
At this time, I would like to thank the makers of Crystal Light Lemonade Drink Mix, for making my day just a little easier to get through!
You would be amazed at the amount of ridiculousness that a child can bring out of a normally calm and quiet human being. *HaHa*
When Markus and John were just little boys, I have clear recollections of them and I being stuck in the car waiting for our parents, and I used to make up all sorts of silly little poems and stories to keep him entertained. Picking a word and making a story out of words that rhymed with that word, or all the words would begin with the same letter. IE: There once was a frog named Pog who lived in a log....you get the idea!
The fun part was when they would laugh and clap when I was done, and they would say "Do it again!", but I could never do it the same way twice, as I was just making the silliness up as I went along.
When I think back on my "made up silliness," most of it was invented in a car. Collin has a song, sung to the tune of "Jingle Bells" that I made up for him when he was a tiny baby, about 3 months old. I clearly remember it being a very snowy night and I was driving the back roads from somewhere in Erie to the farm in North East. Collin was always soothed by the sound of my voice, so I would spend much of my time singing to him, especially in the car, because he needed to be assured that I was still there. I know those of you that haven't already been blessed with hearing the song are just dying to know how it goes....
Collin Michael Scharrer, is a little boy
Loves his Mom and Dad, and his little bear toy
We love Collin Michael, very very much
We fill him up with cereal and apple juice and stuff
Oh, Collin Michael, Collin Michael, Collin Michael Scharrer
We love little babies, even though they don't know who they are
OH! Collin Michael, Collin Michael, Collin Michael Scharrer
We love little babies, EVEN THOUGH THEY DON'T KNOW WHO THEY ARE!!
I know, I'm strange, but babies love me, and to this day, I can sing Collin his song and put a smile on his face.
Being a mother requires a great deal of creativity, that's why Mary would be perfect for the job, can you just imagine all the awesome bedtime stories she could come up with? I can....!
I love being mama.
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